We spent the entire day today in Columbus trying to buy a van.
Can I add a few side notes here?
DO NOT drink this on a road trip.
And, can SOMEONE please invent a power window between the front seats and the rest of the car? Even on a quick two hour trip I was tempted to roll up my imaginary window and say, “Best of luck to you all. May the odds be ever in your favor.”
Also, driving any distance with a potty training toddler is NO JOKE.
Anyway, as much as it pains me, we are heading back into van-land.
We packed up the kiddos, all but Reagan, because clearly he was smarter than all of us. Our Pilot has been good to us but as a family of 6, we have realized that it wasn’t meeting our needs.
I had all of our financing squared away and when we found the van of our dreams the loan officer assured me that with a quick punch of the fax machine we’d be set.
So we set out, confident we’d come home with a “new to us” car that will change our lives.
What was I smoking?
3 hours later we got there.
We finagled and negotiated and crunched numbers.
4:40 we got the deal we could be happy with.
4:41 I called the bank.
I called back.
5:00 is when the insurance office and the banks closed for the day.
We were running out of time.
Was God protecting us from a bad deal?
Or had I just dropped the ball?
Now typically something like this would have been sent into a tailspin of loathing and despair and frustration. I would have sulked and stewed and whined the whole way home.
After leaving the dealership Jason even looked at me and said, “What’s going on here? I can usually ‘read’ you. I got nothing.”
Being angry at the bank was not going to put us in the van and on our way home. Placing blame on anyone would not get our payoff check.
I just had to rest in what I knew and that is that God was good.
I have friends who have struggled getting teaching jobs this summer.
I have friends who after multiple failed attempts of finding Mr Right, have only mastered finding Mr Wrong.
I have friends who another month has passed and they still aren’t pregnant.
I have friends who have marriages that are still not healed.
I have friends who after walking carefully with medical treatment after medical treatment, still haven’t found the healing that they desperately want.
Much bigger issues than whether or not I get a van…
But because God is a god who holds the universe as carefully as he holds our hearts, He cares about them all.
And I have found that when I have disappointments that instead of bulling up and pouting, I should only go to the only one who can take care of any situation.
God and His word should be our immediate response.
Not our spouses, not Facebook, not our best friend.
Check this promise out from Philippians 4:6-7 Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.
The God of creation will settle you down.
No matter the situation. No matter the disappointment.
Because you’ll find if you let disappointment brew, it will soon turn to discouragement.
Which will turn into doubt and unbelief.
Which is EXACTLY where the enemy wants you.
Don’t let him win.
He’s such a punk.
He deserves not one second of our time.
So, for a second time tomorrow, we will try again.
I’ll have all my ducks in a row, say a little prayer, a with praise in my heart I will remind myself that God is still on the throne.
With or without a minivan.
So Devil, listen up, because you can suck it.
I’m a book-shelving, former tap dancer, wanna be writer, singer,
and banjo player, mother of 4, wife of 1, follower of Christ,
walking in the shadow of the Proverbs 31 woman
and redeemed by the grace and love of an Almighty God…
just living the dream.